Definition of NTR (Netorare) “寝取られ”

Ok folks some people dont know what NTR means so i will post a huge thread about it lol... BTW after reading this and people start to understand what NTR means i might put up a poll asking if we should have NTR theme mangas or not.

NTR is an abbreviation of “netorare” (寝取られ in Japanese). It means “having your lover taken from you”. (A more direct translation is “to have something taken from you while you sleep”.)

NTR can be considered similar to the word “cuckold” in English. However, “cuckold”, so far as I know, specifically refers to when a husband is being cheated on by his wife.

NTR, however, is more general. Not only can it refer to when a husband is being cheated on, but also when a boyfriend’s girlfriend is cheating, or when a girl that a guy has fallen for (unrequited love) is seeing someone else and it hurts him to know it.

It can even go so far as to refer to when a brother is upset that his sister is seeing someone he doesn’t like, or just that his sister is no longer the sweet little angel anymore. Or it can also refer to how a son feels discovering his mother is with someone other than his father.

It doesn’t have to be gender specific, either. All of the above situations could easily be changed to where it is a woman who suffers from some kind of sense of betrayal. But, like most porn, it’s overwhelmingly written from a male perspective.

Usually the type of NTR used in a story is specified by saying something like “母NTR” (mother NTR), “彼女NTR” (girlfriend NTR), “妻NTR” (wife NTR), “妹NTR” (younger sister NTR), and so on.

Personally, when translating these stories, the only ones I will cover are where it is a betrayal in the context of a lover’s relationship, such as wife, girlfriend, or unrequited love. I just don’t see the betrayal when it is family. As I’ve said in forums many times, we don’t live under the Taliban, so your sisters and daughters have the right to sleep with whoever they want. (Well, a daughter technically needs to be of age of consent, but a father or brother should be focused on her well being, not jealous of her lovers.)

One last note. Sometimes there is a related type of manga or story called “寝取り”, or “netori” (this seems to be more common in video games than manga). The very slight change of verb form makes all the difference in the world. “Netorare” is having your girlfriend stolen. “Netori” is stealing someone else’s girlfriend.

Stories can be written from the point of anyone in the love triangle, but the aim of netorare stories is to give a reader a sense of the hurt and betrayal on the part of the one being cheated on. A netori story would put the reader in the position of the one doing the stealing. It’s not upsetting, because there’s no empathy for the victim. NTR is more about the sadism and masochism of the situation.

For example, if in a story a girl is with a guy who is a real jerk, and she’d be better off without him, and a nicer guy comes along and they cheat on the jerk, and in the end she’s with the nice guy, that’s not NTR, that’s justice.

If there’s basically nothing wrong with the guy being cheated on (though usually he’s a little hapless), and so we sympathize at least a little bit, and are simultaneously upset by the cheating but turned on by it, that’s NTR.

One last definition note. The experience of being both turned on and upset at the same time is referred to as “rage”, often spelled with capital letters, RAGE, on 4chan. RAGE stories don’t have to be NTR, they can be any sort of situation that ends badly, such as when a girl gets raped, and/or tortured, maybe even killed, and the rapist gets away with it. The only point is that RAGE inspires conflicting feelings, whatever the subject matter.

In the case of NTR, RAGE usually means the people doing the cheating get away with it, maybe even revel in it, and the person being cheated on basically gets shafted. The most rage-making NTR, in my opinion, is when the people cheating sadistically throw it in the victim’s face. If a story ends where it was all a bad dream, or the people doing the cheating get their just deserts, then it’s not as upsetting, not as RAGE making, and less NTR-ish. At least as I see it.

Hope that helps clear things up.